Пресс-релиз - Tony Randall to take early retirement

Tony Randall to take early retirement

It has been revealed today that Tony Randall is to take early retirement. The reason for this remains very secretive, but sources close to the driver have hinted that it may have something to do with an accident that he suffered during a recent post race party.

Randall's close friend Karl Amitey told our reporter that during the party there was an incident involving 2 cows, a step ladder, a large quantity of cheesecake, a skateboard, 3 scantily clad pit girls and a family pack of helium balloons.

We managed to get a response from Tony's manager who simply said "We'd been considering replacing the Donkey with a driver with much higher intelligence, that new driver starts tomorrow"

That new driver is rumoured to be the talented young Brit Pete Stoppe